The wife came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making
love to a very attractive young woman. And was somewhat upset.
"You are a disrespectful pig!" she cried. "How dare you do this to me
-- faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving you. I want a divorce!
And the husband replied "Hang on just a minute love, so at least I can tell you what happened."
"Fine, go ahead," she sobbed, "but they'll be the last words you'll say to me!"
And the husband began -- "Well, I was getting into the car to drive home
and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and
out and defenseless that I took pity on her and let her into the car.
I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She
told me that she hadn't eaten for three days! So, in my compassion, I
brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night,
the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on weight.
The poor thing devoured them in moments.
Since she needed a good clean up I suggested a shower, and while she was
doing that I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes so I threw them away.
Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans
that you have had for a few years, but don't use because you say they
are too tight. I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary
present, which you don't use because I don't have good taste.
I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don't use just
to annoy her, and I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive
boutique and don't use because someone at work has a pair the same."
The husband took a quick breath and continued - "She was so grateful for
my understanding and help and as I walked her to the door she turned to
me with tears in her eyes and said,
Please ... do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?"
love to a very attractive young woman. And was somewhat upset.
"You are a disrespectful pig!" she cried. "How dare you do this to me
-- faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving you. I want a divorce!
And the husband replied "Hang on just a minute love, so at least I can tell you what happened."
"Fine, go ahead," she sobbed, "but they'll be the last words you'll say to me!"
And the husband began -- "Well, I was getting into the car to drive home
and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and
out and defenseless that I took pity on her and let her into the car.
I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She
told me that she hadn't eaten for three days! So, in my compassion, I
brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night,
the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on weight.
The poor thing devoured them in moments.
Since she needed a good clean up I suggested a shower, and while she was
doing that I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes so I threw them away.
Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans
that you have had for a few years, but don't use because you say they
are too tight. I also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary
present, which you don't use because I don't have good taste.
I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don't use just
to annoy her, and I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive
boutique and don't use because someone at work has a pair the same."
The husband took a quick breath and continued - "She was so grateful for
my understanding and help and as I walked her to the door she turned to
me with tears in her eyes and said,
Please ... do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?"
