scoobyjoe2007
Petrolheads
A driver is pulled over by a guard. The guard approaches the drivers door.
'Is there a problem guard?'
The guard says, 'Sir, you were speeding. Can I see your licence please?'
The driver responds, 'I'd give it to you but I don't have one.'
'You don't have one?'
The man responds, 'I lost it four times for drink driving.'
The guard is shocked. 'I see. Can I see your vehicle registration papers please?'
'I'm sorry, I can't do that.'
The guard says, 'Why not?'
'I stole this car.'
The guard says, 'Stole it?'
The man says, 'Yes, and I killed the owner.'
At this point the guard is getting irate. 'You what!?'
'She's in the boot if you want to see.'
The guard looks at the man and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes, five squad cars show up, surrounding the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.
The senior officer says 'Sir, could you step out of your vehicle please!'
The man steps out of his vehicle. 'Is there a problem sir?'
'One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.'
'Murdered the owner?'
The officer responds, 'Yes, could you please open the boot of your car please?'
The man opens the boot, revealing nothing but an empty boot.
The officer says, 'Is this your car sir?'
The man says 'Yes', and hands over the registration papers.
The officer, understandably, is quite stunned. 'One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving licence.'
The man digs in his pocket revealing a wallet and hands it to the officer. The officer opens the wallet and examines the licence. He looks quite puzzled. 'Thank you sir, one of my officers told me you didn't have a licence, stole this car, and murdered the owner.'
The man replies, 'I bet you the lying ba*tard told you I was speeding, too!
'Is there a problem guard?'
The guard says, 'Sir, you were speeding. Can I see your licence please?'
The driver responds, 'I'd give it to you but I don't have one.'
'You don't have one?'
The man responds, 'I lost it four times for drink driving.'
The guard is shocked. 'I see. Can I see your vehicle registration papers please?'
'I'm sorry, I can't do that.'
The guard says, 'Why not?'
'I stole this car.'
The guard says, 'Stole it?'
The man says, 'Yes, and I killed the owner.'
At this point the guard is getting irate. 'You what!?'
'She's in the boot if you want to see.'
The guard looks at the man and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes, five squad cars show up, surrounding the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.
The senior officer says 'Sir, could you step out of your vehicle please!'
The man steps out of his vehicle. 'Is there a problem sir?'
'One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.'
'Murdered the owner?'
The officer responds, 'Yes, could you please open the boot of your car please?'
The man opens the boot, revealing nothing but an empty boot.
The officer says, 'Is this your car sir?'
The man says 'Yes', and hands over the registration papers.
The officer, understandably, is quite stunned. 'One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving licence.'
The man digs in his pocket revealing a wallet and hands it to the officer. The officer opens the wallet and examines the licence. He looks quite puzzled. 'Thank you sir, one of my officers told me you didn't have a licence, stole this car, and murdered the owner.'
The man replies, 'I bet you the lying ba*tard told you I was speeding, too!
good one alrite